Monday, May 3, 2010

looking for the "money shot"

today is monday may 3rd.. which means that tomorrow is tuesday may 4th.. the day that we could potentially find out if puncakes is a baby boy or girl, assuming baby cooperates.. i can say that i'm super excited.. but i don't think that gets the real emotion across.. i've known i was pregnant since the end of january.. i'm not necessarily showing just yet, since i had my belly from before hand so i can't put the "blame" on puncakes for that.. but anyway.. back to what i was saying - so even though we've known we've been pregnant for over 3 months now.. and since then.. we've done the ultrasounds.. seen the sonograms and.. most importantly.. heard the heartbeat - with all that being said, tomorrow makes puncakes that much more real to me.. i don't know why.. but actually calling the baby by the names we've chosen would just solidify this whole process.. i love calling baby puncakes.. and i'm sure that we will continue doing that even after baby's born.. but after tomorrow.. i will say baby lyla.. or baby quinn.. those are the names we're going with for girl and boy (respectively).. lyla we've been sold on for quite some time so i'm fairly certain it will stick.. for the boy's names.. we've gone from liam.. to luca.. and as of last week.. quinn.. the middle name will be maximus either way.. :)

so yeah.. i'm excited.. and i cannot wait.. but i still have 21 hours to go.. so until then, i'll have to find ways to keep myself occupied.. it's funny.. did i tell you that i've already lost my identity ever since we told friends and family we were expecting?? it's odd.. jeremy is still being called jeremy.. no one's called me by my name in months.. i'm just "mama" now.. and i've been told it only gets worse.. when they go to school.. you're literally just bla bla's mom.. maybe i'll get used to it.. but for now.. i keep repeating my name after they say mama.. most of my closest friends don't have babies yet.. so i'm sure that i will be returning the favor at some point soon.. until then though.. i guess i'll just have to embrace this

in the next week or two (or 3).. i'm supposed to feel the baby kick.. i don't really have any idea what that feels like.. so i've been doing my research, as usual.. and it's described as "quickening".. kind of like a butterfly going off in your belly.. doesn't that sound super strange?? yeah.. i think so too.. others say it feels like popcorn popping and finally.. i've also read that it feels like gas and it's very hard to differentiate the two.. but eventually it all becomes crystal clear.. especially once the baby gets bigger and stronger.. maybe we'll even see hand and foot prints towards the last few weeks.. that would completely freak me out.. or maybe i'll think it's cute by then?? who knows.. emotions are all over the place during this time..

well, this is all for today - next time i write, i hope to be calling puncakes by their upcoming given name...

might as well sign off with what we've been talking about..
lyla's mama / quinn's mama

:)

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